What are your fears?
The big ones, and the little.
My BIGGEST little fear is spiders (anything with more than four legs really, but spiders most of all).
This first day of the new year, the new decade, rather than making a traditional resolution, I chose a central image. I meditated on it, and what came was SPINNING.
My BIGGEST big fear is being stuck. So, spinning, as in spinning my wheels, didn’t appeal to me. UGH, I thought, haven’t I been spinning here long enough?
And then, because the mind is a gorgeous web of association and information, this came to me:
Despite my fear of spiders, I am a woman who loves creatures. My mind alighted on, among other things, WEBS. Spiders spin webs out of instinct. Humans spin tales out of instinct as well. Stories are called yarns.
Out of chaos, we create. We create order and connection. We create because it sustains us.
We live on an sphere that is always spinning.
Even at our stillest, we move.
On New Year’s night, I went into the bathroom to get ready for bed, and grabbing my towel, found an unpleasant surprise.
Seriously. I stifled the urge to scream and squash it into oblivion, and I carefully carried the entire towel outside and left it to its next adventure.
Then I came back inside and laughed.
Because wasn’t that spider the perfect metaphor?
When an idea comes to me — a really good idea, the kind I can spin into something remarkable — what’s my first response?
Often, I want to scream and squish it. Other times, I want to run away.
But, what if, this year, instead of those responses, I try to calmly escort the idea OUTSIDE, where it belongs?
What if I allow all these terrifying STORIES to live out their useful lives?
I don’t know, but I’m going to try.
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